001 | voice

[comic_relief]

Hey, wait. Not yet, hold on. You can't come yet, I have to call somebody fir--whoa! _{[A stifled intake of breath. A pleading note.]} Oh, come on, give me a break. Not yet!

<sub>[The message starts with a Jack's voice drifting in and out of range, like somebody caught between talking away from the receiver and turning into it. Urgency threads through the words.

There's a distant squeak of bed springs, another hissed breath.]</sub>

Ohhhh, I see something! _{[That urgency ramps up to something closer to awe and terror of the unknown.]} It's pink in there! I can see it moving around! I forget what I'm supposed to do! I was just getting used to having Eggbert around and now he's falling to pieces on me.

_[Faintly:]

Oh, shit...

_{[Even fainter, the sound of a delicate, barely audible cheep.]}

What the hell is that? You gotta come over and bring the dog food or something-- Wait. _{[Now there's a sudden silence as a perplexed somebody realizes this isn't the private call he thought he was making. Goddamn phones, where's a moogle when you need one?]} This isn't even the right line! Lemme try that again.

_{[That there is the definitive 'click' of a hang up.]}

Comments

[comic_relief]

_{[From somewhere inside the room, a voice made jolly with exaggerated good cheer calls back:]}

Nothing! Nothiiiing! Not a thing!

_{["Say the words enough times and they'll come true," the motto of the fake it 'til you make it school of philosophy. Suddenly his door swings open. If Eliza's standing very close, she might want to step back a little as Jack is right there, filling the doorway with a smile. Actually, she might want to step back, anyway. He's looking a bit manic.]}

Say, while you're here... How long does something normally take to hatch out of an egg?

_{[Asking for reasons that have nothing to do with the egg that's been living in his rented room with him all this time.]}

[dragoness]

[ ... well then, since eliza has No Idea about this egg hatching thing, there's only one conclusion she can draw from this question. ]

Are you askin' because you think I've laid eggs before?!

[ because.

you know.

she's a dragon. ]

[comic_relief]

<sub>[Her? Lay eggs? Concordian dragons lay eggs, sure, and she reminds him of a Concordian a bit, but he's seen wyvern eggs from when...? Right, from when they'd taken over the Dragon's Nest. That big egg, making that weird distress sound as it was attacked...

No, Jack, don't do it, don't contemplate the biology involved, don't think about it-- Too late, he looks down at her, mentally putting tiny girl and man-sized wyvern egg side-by-side. Well, that's easy to answer.]</sub>

Nah, that'd be silly.

<sub>[You're way too small to have pushed that giant thing out of you, Eliza, your hips would break.

Anyway.]</sub>

But, uhhh, maybe you've had some relevant life experience, and in your wisdom and generosity you could share.

_{[Nailed it?]}

[dragoness]

[ ... she doesn't know why he's looking her over like that, but for some reason, her hips suddenly ache.

( eliza's too young for it now, but there's a flash of white hair in her mind; a mother, a countess, a leader for her people. the vision is gone just as quickly as it appears, but eliza knows exactly who that was and why it makes her stomach turn upside down. )

a thin eyebrow lifts and doubt is cast over her expression, that thick snake behind her twisting up. ]

With eggs? Eggs are for eating! Scrambled, lesco, deviled, or over-easy!

[comic_relief]

_{[Sweet baby Jesus, not her, too.]}

No, no, I mean the purely non-edible kind! _{[What the hell are you even saying, Jack.]} Hypothetically, let's say, if the thing inside was alive, what do... you do with it?

1/2

[dragoness]

[ oh my god, jack... what is wrong with you. ]

There are no purely non-edible kinds!

[ beat ]

[dragoness]

[ and then she gasps ]

Is it another dragon!?

[comic_relief]

<sub>[So much is wrong with him. So very, very much. But that's a story for another day. He straightens up in the doorway, looking vaguely hunted.

Nervous laughter. What's the right answer here.]</sub>

If it were, would you try to eat it? I'll show you, but only if you promise to let it live.

_[♫]