the network

Good news everyone: negotiations went through and Weaver's is now going to officially start selling drinks over forty proof.

[ Hey, Eliot. Heyyyy, Eliot. You're totally getting side-eyed over the phone here, somehow. Hope you enjoy this weird new form of communication. ]

In... celebration of this wonderful new landmark, drinks'll be half off tomorrow night. Drop by and get yourself drunk ten times faster than usual. Try to limit any vomiting to the bathroom.

[ Please, someone, hire this guy as your publicist, he's just so enthusiastic. ]