Backdated: June 10th, 2:24am - A very drunk network post

[onteamdyson]

yOU KNOW WHAT SUCKS? like. i mean. okay that waS a f engeral. question. don't like.
f you if you say vaccuums liMke some kIND o f smrtaASS. im gonna tell you. So listen the fridge up!

men. men suck. all men. zero exceptions.

they are LYING LIARS that LIE? and you trust them an D THEY JUST>? they just leave? and they breaK YOUR entiRe hearT?!?! and the Y aRENT EVen worth SHIT! ok? they warent worth SHIP! so like. dont even lose spilled milk over them and

stfuff.

becAuse even when you

if you donT even fall for them but you just need them? they arent there! you'R e just on y o ur own! so dont even trust anyone!

Comments

in: l.dectus

[vdova]

i know how to smother a man in his sleep
just as a casual aside

un: all

[beallandendall]

I'll provide an alibi.

[vdova]

i won't need one but the sentiment is appreciated it ;)

[beallandendall]

In this day and age, are you sure you won't?

UN: junglejeevesisdead

[onteamdyson]

he n ev er sleeps. hes an unfeeling killer robot hivemind iwith no free will or emotionas

ps stove doesnt even count beca use hes not just a stupid man hes like. a sunbeam in a gramp a sweater

hes the huma n embodiement of home made waffles.

[vdova]

i can't disagree with that

[ be glad you can't see the stupid grin on her face right now kenzi ]

he has to sleep sometime
i remember him doing it before

[onteamdyson]

[You know she speaks the truth, Natzilla!]

You remember him sleeping? Do you remember him lying to everyone and pulling hearts out of chests like temple of doom and then just crushing them in his bear hands. bare hansd. not bera. STEPPING ON EMOTIONS AND MAKING YOU LOOOK LIKE AN IDIOT FOR FEELING ANY FEELINGS FOR A PSYCHOPAATH THAT TRIED TO DKILL UR FRIENDS AND ROBOT YOUR BCUKY?

just as. i mean. like a hypyotehetical situation? for exammple?

[vdova]

believe it or not, i do

[onteamdyson]

ok honestly... im surprised hes survived this long then

you have insane amounts of restraint, o fiery one. teach me ur zen-like ways

[vdova]

you act like i never tried
the only reason i didn't is because he tried to blow me up with a grenade

[onteamdyson]

WGHAT?!

NAT.
W
WHAT
THE HELL. WHATL THE ACTRUAL
FUCKIANGL ELL

OH MY GOD

WHY DIDNT YOU SAY ANTHGIN SOOONER?!

I HAD SEX WITH THAT PSYCOHPATH LIKE.... SO MANY TIMES?!?!?!?!?! AND IT WAS REALLY GOOD BUT STILL?!?!?!?!

[Hoes before oh noes, Nat. It's not like the three of you constantly tried to warn her or anything, only to be brushed off until she finally got the infatuated, floating, pink hearts out of her eyes and went with her gut.]

can i borrow some cat litter? if i buy som orange juice i think it makes a bomb...

[vdova]

[ oh my god kenzi ]

i'm fresh out, sorry
and honestly
someone trying to blow me up with a grenade is not the worst thing that's happened to me
remind me to tell you what your cousin did to me someday ;)

[onteamdyson]

[This is perfectly acceptable message board behavior that she definitely won't regret after a massive hangover or anything, it's fine.]

Did he hold you upsidedown until all your lunch money fell out? or make you cry during hide and seek?

nah nevermind i know its probs worse. you guys are hella fucked up, danger magnets.


omg nat im gonna put magnets. fridge magnets. on. hs arm. holy shit. HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME?

[At least she's not thinking about potentially falling for a shitty, irredeemable murderer who was twice her age anymore? Progress]

[vdova]

let's just say i can't wear bikinis anymore

[onteamdyson]

Bullshit nat you have the bod of a godsess that qui t her dayjob to be one of th ose moddelss that stan ds in front of boats and wears high heels but no pants

you could do the giantmartiini glass sexy dance and maek a killing hdu